Look What Came In: Red, Black and Square

Is it check? Is it tartan? Is it plaid? Gingham?! Only a true connoisseur of the warp and the weft would know the difference and I am not one. What I do know is that this t-shirt would look bloody fantastic on anyone who feels like squeezing into it. It's about a size XL.

Who's gonna get it on 14 August? Will there be a fight? Tears? I hope so not.